The “You Are Not Worthy Unless You Do Something For Me” Wound

In today’s solo episode, I’m pulling back the curtain on a very real, very messy, recent moment in my marriage- and the powerful truth it revealed about healing, triggers, and self-responsibility.

I share the story of a recent freakout I had with my husband that cracked open one of my deepest wounds. What started as a playful, flirtatious evening spiraled into tears, anger, and a water bottle being thrown across the room… and ultimately became one of the most important mirrors I’ve had in my healing journey.

This episode is not about blame- it’s about ownership. It’s about recognizing that no matter how “healed” we think we are, triggers will sneak up and demand our attention. And it’s about asking the hard question: are we gaslighting ourselves by blaming others for our wounds?

Inside this conversation, I walk you through:

• The night I completely lost my shit- and what it really cracked open inside of me
• Why my husband refuses to apologize for my triggers (and why I actually admire that)
• How quickly a trigger can hijack even the most loving energy
• The difference between true abuse and everyday “gaslighting” we project onto others
• Why the responsibility for healing always, always comes back to us
• How darkness and discomfort are actually the catalysts for quantum leaps in self-worth

This is a raw, unfiltered reminder that your triggers are not the end of the world- they’re invitations. Every freakout, every uncomfortable mirror, every “WTF just happened” moment is guiding you deeper into your worth and your healing (even when it doesn’t feel like it).

Let’s dive in, shall we?

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